Complaint To Santa - Recently Updated Pages

Things I use For Homework not really part of this ste its just helpful to use so i can save url's

cba11hi — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 20:27:14 CST

http://www.bookrags.com/essay-2005/3/8/0833/74469
Taylor Woolard is a weird guy
http://www.crystalinks.com/greekculture.html
http://audacity.sourceforge.net/download/beta_windows#recdown

Home of the Funny Santa Letters

cba11hi — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 08:43:25 CDT

Hi welcome to the site.
Hope you enjoy, for any comments send them to santacorporation@ymail.com We have been on this for a while now and it is past christmas. Our group has decided to extend the website and

For any funny Santa letters just send them to the e-mail address up above. Also the new "Ask Santa" page allows you to talk to Santa and he will post some answers on the site for you.

We are looking for funny santa jokes for the site. So of you have any just send them to santacorporation@yamil.com we are doing this to make the site better. When you send them in just wait a little while so me or one of the other contributors add them. Just go to Santa jokes page.

Its Almost Christmas time so please send in some funny santa letters. We are expecting to have a rise in veiwers during the christmas season so we need you help to please our weiwers + youselves. Thank You and Keep sending in those letters!!!!!

created by cba11hi and demonpiggy09
(happy Friend)

Ask Santa

cba11hi — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 08:44:26 CST

This is brand new to the site Just E-mail q's you have to santa or the letters that were written on the site. Just e-mail us at santacomplaint@yahoo.com. If your question is good enough we'll even put it on the site.

:) :)

Dear Santa,
Where do you work and how much do u make?
From, Phil Puddimg

Dear Phil,
I work at the North Pole With all of the other little slaves of mine.... I mean friends of mine. I make about 2.5 million dollars a year.
From the man in the big red suit,
Santa Claus

Dear Santa,
Why, last Christmas, were you standing at the end of my bed trying to take your pants off??
Signed,
Very, very disturbed......

Dear Disturbed,
Ummm.... That was an illusion you had.... I would always-... Never do that. That would be sexual harrassment. And everyone knows I would do... I would NOT do that!!! You could ask any of my slaves... elves and thae would say that I would never EVER do that...... Actually, don't ask any of them. They will lie and say I have.....
Love your very, VERY good friend,
Santa

Don't ask about that below this writing.

Top Letter Of the Month

cba11hi — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 12:59:45 CST

The top letter of the month gos to a man we like to call
Dear Santa,
I do not like your behavior. You are teaching my children to treat women as objects. I mean seriously Santa Ho Ho Ho. I am very ashamed of you and i would like you to stop coming to my house.

From a very concerned mother,
Cheryl Bottomcakes

Lady who wrote letter

Christmas Carols

cba11hi — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 12:50:46 CST

The following song was written and sung on television by a person called Achmed The dead terrorist:

Tune to jingle bells

Dashing throught the sand
With a bomb strapped to my back
I've got a dirty plan
For christmas in iraq

Google

cba11hi — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 12:49:39 CST

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Santa letters

cba11hi — Sun, 09 Dec 2007 17:44:25 CST

Dear Mr. Santa Clause,
I do not enjoy your line of business. I would Also like to keep this on a professional level. Soon you will be getting a letter from my lawyer. I am filing for a restraining order and i am sueing you for a small some of money. About $5,000,000. I am doing this for the following reasons:

Trespassing on Private Property
Identity Theft
Damage to property
Breaking and entering
theft
assault
slavery
breaking Curfew Law
NO flying licsence
NO Seatbelt (bad influence on the children)
Breaking the speed limit
Animal Abuse
Flipping The bird to an officer

I hope you can accept this letter before the holidays. The court trial will be held on December 24, 2007 at 6 p.m.. When you get the call from my lawyer he answers to the name of a Mr.Bernstien. (apoligies to Sam Bernstien)

From your only beleiver.
Little Joey Bill

Dear Mr.Santa Claus,
Im going to speak the truth...
I dont enjoy that red suit of yours. Its not very amusing and the ladies might not find it attractive in fact.. Youlook like a fat slob.....Im sorry you had to hear that. By the way tell Rudolph that, that red nose is actully a tumor good luck

From The jedi,
Yoda

P.S. May the force be with you.
(Apoligies to Goerge Lucas Company)

Dear Santa Claus,
I have decided to switch positions with you this year instead of you delivering presents i will. The little elves already know i am coming( actually they came up with the idea.) My suit will be delivered to you soon and i will expect the same from you. I want it before christmas santa got it, get it, good.

From the man who is about to steal your job,
Easter Bunny

P.S. Do u think my suit will fit you? You might have to have mrs. claus make you one. Thank you for understanding.

Dear Santa,
I do not like your behavior. You are teaching my children to treat women as objects. I mean seriously Santa Ho Ho Ho. I am very ashamed of you and i would like you to stop coming to my house.

From a very concerned mother,
Cheryl Bottomcakes

Lady who wrote letter

The Game Page

cba11hi — Sun, 02 Dec 2007 18:45:45 CST

This is just new to the site games

Funny photos of Santa

cba11hi — Sun, 02 Dec 2007 18:07:33 CST

Sorry for the language but see santa abusing this poor little, actually quite big reindeer.	This is Santa's true form. Does he look jolly and marry to you?	This is the kind of person you all love and cherish.
This is what santa did to this poor little snowman.	Those kids should go on the naughty list for offering that snowman a smoke.	Type your photo caption or credit here.
Type your photo caption or credit here.	Type your photo caption or credit here.	Type your photo caption or credit here.

I did. :-)

Santa Jokes

cba11hi — Sat, 01 Dec 2007 09:16:36 CST

After Christmas Thought A few days after Christmas, my six year son and I were talking. He asked, "Mom, is there a Santa Claus?" "Well, what do you think?" I asked him. He replied, "Well, my Playstation that I got and my gift from Santa were wrapped in the same kind of wrapping paper." He thought for a minute and said, "I'll tell you what ... you and Dad can go on buying me presents and let's just forget we ever had this talk!"

Top twenty ways to confuse Santa

Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds.
While he's in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket.
Leave him a note, explaining that you've gone away for the holidays. Ask if he would mind watering your plants.
While he's in the house, replace all his reindeer with exact replicas. Then wait and see what happens when he tries to get them to fly.
Keep an angry bull in your living room. If you think a bull goes crazy when he sees a little red cape, wait until he sees that big, red Santa suit!
Build an army of mean-looking snowmen on the roof, holding signs that say "We hate Christmas," and "Go away Santa"
Leave a note by the telephone, telling Santa that Mrs. Claus called and wanted to remind him to pick up some milk and a loaf of bread on his way home.
Throw a surprise party for Santa when he comes down the chimney. Refuse to let him leave until the strippers arrive.
While he's in the house, find the sleigh and sit in it. As soon as he comes back and sees you, tell him that he shouldn't have missed that last payment, and take off.
Leave a plate filled with cookies and a glass of milk out, with a note that says, "For The Tooth Fairy." Leave another plate out with half a stale cookie and a few drops of skim milk in a dirty glass with a note that says, "For Santa"
Take everything out of your house as if it's just been robbed. When Santa arrives, show up dressed like a policeman and say, "Well, well. They always return to the scene of the crime."
Leave out a copy of your Christmas list with last-minute changes and corrections.
While he's in the house, cover the top of the chimney with barbed wire.
Leave lots of hunting trophies and guns out where Santa's sure to see them. Go outside, yell, "Ooh! Look! A deer! And he's got a red nose!" and fire a gun.
Leave Santa a note, explaining that you've moved. Include a map with unclear and hard-to-read directions to your new house.
Set a bear trap at the bottom of the chimney. Wait for Santa to get caught in it, and then explain that you're sorry, but from a distance, he looked like a bear.
Leave out a Santa suit, with a dry-cleaning bill.
Paint "hoof-prints" all over your face and clothes. While he's in the house, go out on the roof. When he comes back up, act like you've been "trampled." Threaten to sue.
Instead of ornaments, decorate your tree with Easter eggs.
Dress up like the Easter Bunny. Wait for Santa to come and then say, "This neighborhood ain't big enough for the both of us."